Borderline Eczema?

So somewhere along the way, Chase started getting really really dry skin on his face. It was so bad that it looked like little red bumps that would not go away. It would maybe go away for a little bit then come back. I think it's from the heater being on at school and at home? He sleeps with a humidifier and his face would clear up over the weekend but once he goes to school he comes back with these red chapped cheeks. 

I know, poor baby. I tried a lot of different things. I tried Up & Up compared to Aquaphor Baby Healing Ointment and Vaseline. It didn't really seem to improve it for good. Until I came across this..

But travel size of course! It came in a tiny little tube but I've been using it and using it and I still have a lot left. I think it was only 99 cents or $1.99 tops. It's the ONLY THING that has worked on Chase. At first I started just by putting it on every night, but when he went back to school on Monday he would come back with red blotches on his face again. It took a weekend of applying 3-4 times a day and maintaining it every night and every morning if time permits. His face is finally normal again. It's still a little pink and somehow he got a new blotch from school. But I don't think that was from dry skin. This stuff works and it's gentle enough to use on his face. Another thing I love about this product is that it's not greasy, absorbs well, it's fragrance free and contains oatmeal. 

THANK YOU EUCERIN!

Rimmel Volume Accelerator Mascara Review

Okay, so I don't wear mascara's very often. I think it's because I feel ripped off EVERY TIME. Every now and then though, I do fall for it and end up buying one in hopes that it will actually do what it says it's going to. This Rimmel mascara is suppose to be a mascara AND makes your lashes grow fuller in 30 days. I'm all about volume when it comes to my lashes. Length is nice but I would like fuller lashes. On top of this being a lash growth treatment, it's suppose to make your lashes look 12x's fuller immediately.

There were other mascara's there that were $5.49 but this was the only one that was $7.99 and I remember from the magazine that this was $7.99 specifically so I decided to get it and try it.

So the packaging is nice, the brush looks a little weird it has this like..bulb shape? I don't even know if that's the right way to describe it. I decided to test it for 30 days and see if there is noticeable growth in volume on my lashes. Keep in mind, I'm also using the BUXOM lash liner that is also suppose to make your lashes grow so I guess this is a bad test since we won't know which one is effective or maybe we'll find out none at all!

I'm going to take pictures of my lashes every week.

I never realized how creepy eyes look without the rest of the face or maybe it's just mine. I have barely any lashes but I can't complain because for being Chinese, my lashes actually are not bad.

Here is my review of this product:

Quality: It comes in a nice package and looks like a mascara is suppose to.

True to Color: It's black so yes true to color.

Pigmentation: N/A

Effectiveness: As for making my lashes look instantly fuller..not very effective. We'll have to see on the growth part.

Rating: 2

I must admit this is probably one of the worse mascara's I've purchased and tried. The formula is REALLY sticky. It makes your lashes clump together and if you have very few lashes like me...it just makes you look like you have even less lashes! It was hard to apply because of the fact that it was so sticky. The brush didn't really feel like it was grabbing my lashes, it was more like rubbing up on it. I even tried to add a second coat hoping it would separate my lashes but it just made it worse and was near impossible because my lashes were now stuck together. I had to try and pick my lashes apart afterwards. Unless putting on mascara is rocket science and I'm just doing it all wrong..it does not work very well. Here is a picture of my lashes with it on after two coats.

Man I didn't realize how many freckles I had til you see it up close on camera!

Never a quick trip to Target..

So after work yesterday, I stopped by Target to pick up diapers and a present for our friend's daughter Hailee. Every time I go there, I spend FOREVER. I reminded myself that I had to hurry since I still had to pick Chase up from school. I started with Hailee's present first since that was the main priority next to diapers. They had sooo many cute girl stuff there. I'm not a girly girl. I don't do pink and sparkles but I must admit I did enjoy looking at extreme girly things to buy for Hailee. I knew she liked Hello Kitty so I got her some stuff from the HelloKitty collection. I really kinda do wish I had a girl so I had an excuse to buy girl stuff.

Anyways, my next stop was...the cosmetic's isle, of course. I remember seeing in Glamour that there was a Rimmel London mascara that was suppose to be pretty good. I couldn't remember the name but I just remember the price so I got the one that was $7.99. I also got some Palmers Stretch Marks lotion to carry around in my purse. I have the one with the pump at home, but my belly has been itching more lately and I don't want to get stretch marks now. I'm also a sucker for travel size products. It's a good way of trying a product without buying the full price one and finding out it doesn't work!

I'm going to do a separate review/blog for the mascara later. 

I've tried the Yes to Carrots body butter (travel size) and LOVED IT! I use it every night on my hand and it really has cured me from the dry hands I've been having. I got the cucumber facial towelettes because we are going to Havasu this weekend. It's easier to pack light since we are only there for a day and not have to bring my two separate face wash (one of them is a pump so you know it's gonna get messy.) I've tried this PONDS one before and I didn't like it because it felt too soapy and was too scented. That I felt bad for not having to rinse. 

We'll have to see how those turn out!

Friendships

This morning, I found out news today that sent me in total shock. My high school best friend's husband passed away yesterday. The way I found out? Through Facebook. I cried, I couldn't believe it. I couldn't wrap my head around how. It was so sudden and I have such mixed emotions. Mixed emotions for the grieving of a friend and Tammy. How sorry I felt for her and what she must be going through. I feel bad, really bad for not being able to be there for her. He was so young, she's so young...

Tammy was my first love. I know it sounds childish, but before there was Jaccie there was Tammy. I guess she was my high school sweetheart. It sounds kind of lesbianic, but I think in some way close friendship between women often sounds like a non-sexual relationship that goes beyond sisterhood. We even got each other rings and called each other wifey. There is nothing I could ever complain or speak ill of when it comes to Tammy. She is one of the few people that I've been blessed with in my life that I think is the closest to perfect. I remember when she got sent to rehab for the wrong reason and me and my sister tried to break her out.

I remember when her and Robert first started dating and it was secretive because Robert was somewhat of a friend to her ex. I'm glad they didn't let that stop them because they ended up being made for each other and getting married. It's not that they didn't already know each other, but I guess I gave them the nudge since I was close to her and he was my friend. 

When I dropped out of high school my senior year, me and her started growing apart only because of our busy schedules. I was working two jobs and living a different type of life and she was busy with school and Robert. That never made us feel that we weren't close anymore. Every time we talked and spoke with each other or had a casual lunch it felt just like the old days. 

I guess when things like this happens, it makes you realize the distance that has settled with the friendships you've had. You don't really realize it at first because you're so busy in your day to day life. We are both busy, we grew up and have jobs, a family of our own. I moved 70 miles away. To hear the news of Robert passing away really put me in complete shock. I cried and am still emotional. Maybe it's also the series of events that has been happening to me in the last week that emotionally and mentally I have not fully recovered to take in such shock. 

I wish I could physically be the one to be there for her right now. To be by her side and let her know everything will be okay. That I'm sorry I haven't been there physically the last couple years. That it never changed her importance in my life and that I want to be the one to comfort her. But sadly, I am not the one that can be there right now. I guess even though in my heart her place has never changed, but in reality it probably has in hers. I'm glad our friend Amy is there for her. We were sisters. I guess it's a little selfish of me to wish that I could be there for her. That I'm allowed to be there for her physically. I don't really know what to do to be honest. I'm sure she wants time alone to cope, to not constantly be reminded of her pain. Not that it's not already constantly on her mind. All I can do is text her and make an attempt to be there for her. When she's ready hopefully she will let me be there physically. 

Robert Tran, you will be missed in our hearts. You were one of my first few friends that I've made since my move to San Diego. Although, we did not maintain a close friendship in our recent years it doesn't matter now. Once a friend, always a friend. I will always remember our journey to get Tammy flowers in L.A because they were the only ones to dip them in glitter. To be able to try and think of creative things to do for Tammy. LAN parties back in the day. When life was simple. You will always be loved and missed in our hearts but never forgotten.

Rock Bottom

So, when I first started this blog I told myself that there were certain things I didn't want to write about. I wanted the blog to be about positive experiences and something maybe another person felt could relate to. I didn't want to write about relationship problems and serious personal issues. I didn't want this to be a journal for a nosy person's pleasure.

I'm very hesitant to write about our financial woes, but then I thought about it financial struggles are part of the average mom. This is what this blog is about, being an average mom facing everyday struggles. So I am going to share about our financial difficulties and maybe at the end of this blog in a couple years the outcome will be us making it through our struggles and encourage others to realize that through tough times, are better times.

I'm not a stress-er. I am the type of person that can handle most situations with ease and know that stressing and freaking out does absolutely nothing but make the situation worse. The other night, my car got repo'd. I freaked out. My fiance and I were sleeping and we woke up to bright lights and a loud car engine sound through our bedroom windows. He looked outside and said, "babe, they're taking your car."

He went outside and talked to the guy. We all know that once someone comes to repossess your car there  is nothing you can do. The guy that comes is just doing his job and has nothing to do with anything else. He came back upstairs and said well, we can give the guy the key to the car and avoid paying $100. We can also empty out the car right now if not, they'll charge us $25 dollars to store everything since they're going to empty out the car when they get there. It was 2AM, we gave them the key and left our stuff in the car. The worse part was of course some neighbor decides that 2AM in the morning is a good time to walk their dog. Personally, I think they are just being nosy.

When Brandon came back upstairs, we laid in bed he eventually went back to sleep and I laid in bed for 2 hours just thinking. I felt so bad, like a failure. Like all things had lost hope and we've hit rock bottom with no other alternatives. Did I think my car was going to get repo'd? No. Did I know I was behind on payments? I had been making payments, maybe not the full amount but I have been. How did we get in this situation? Well lets see, I spend an average of $400 on gas a month, maybe more. When gas prices went up it went up to over $600. That is A LOT of money. A couple months ago, we decided Brandon was going to file for bankruptcy and I was going to go through debt consolidation. He voluntarily gave up his car and it was just more fitting to file for bankruptcy since he'll owe so much money from that already.

Anyways, I laid in bed from 2-4am, before I finally moved into the living room to watch TV and finally fell asleep around 5 in the morning. We were living above our means. How can we possible get out of this situation when we've already done all that we could to narrow down our bills to just the necessities? What do you do when you just don't make enough money? I started feeling hopeless because for once, I didn't know what to do. How to resolve and even worse it seemed like it couldn't be resolved.  I started thinking about drastic solutions. The only way out is if we move to San Diego where I won't be spending $600 dollars on gas. Brandon will be the one to commute but he'll be taking his bike so gas won't be as bad. If I live close enough to work, having just one vehicle won't be so bad. I can ask my friend to see if she's willing to watch Chase for a cheaper amount than I pay the daycare. that's it. That's the only way. I began to pray.

I cried periodically the next day. Probably due to lack of sleep, stress, hormones from being pregnant. Mostly, I think it was because I felt like I've failed. I've always prided myself in making it. That I had nothing to start with and was on my own but managed to still live comfortably. I felt like I've let everyone down, mainly myself.

I am so thankful that I have such a supportive family. My sister is amazing. She is my mother Theresa. She has been my rock through the toughest times and the only person in my life that I felt never gave up on me and never doubted me. Maybe she doubted me a little but she never showed it. She came to my comfort and although it was nice it wasn't what made me feel sane again. My fiance has also been amazingly supportive and reassuring me that everything will be okay and we can do this together.

Finally after a day of letting myself go completely. I came to my senses and gathered my thoughts and figured out what I needed to do. Once that happen, my worries immediately became motivation. It was like this weight has been lifted off me. Even though nothing had been resolved yet, I felt as if though everything has. I guess everyone freaks out sometimes. It's only natural. I freaked out for literally 18 hours and then I felt like a new person. I felt a new sense of hope because I had figured out what I needed to do.

"God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength but with your resting he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it." 
                                                            -1 Corinthians 10:13


I guess the reason why I don't really stress about things usually is that I know there is always a solution. It may not present itself at the moment but there always will be. There is no point in stressing about something you have no control over. The only thing you can do, is do what you can.

So our solution is, we are going to let them take my car. I would've been screwed on it anyways since it was a lease and I was only allowed 48k miles on it. I was already on 64k and I still had another 2.5 years to go. I'm already over 4k upside down on what the car was worth. I'm going on maternity leave in 2 months so if I can stick it out and drive the Trooper for 2 months, even carpool so we can save money on gas since that thing only gets like $13 mpg. Brandon will continue taking the bike to work. Once I'm on maternity leave, I won't really need a car. At least it's not as important as a car now. I'm going to file for bankruptcy. That alone is going to save me over $700 every month. No car payment, no insurance, no debt settlement cost.

There is such a taboo with filing for bankruptcy, but in reality I see it as a fresh start. If you're in a bad enough place financially to consider debt settlement or bankruptcy that means your credit isn't doing so well already. I think most people are afraid of bankruptcies. Maybe it hurts their pride to admit defeat? If I continued with my debt settlement, it looks like on my credit report that I have a lot of debt still and am late on paying everything because that's what debt settlement is. You let it become late or sent to collections then you settle for a fraction of the cost. It would take years for my credit to start recovering and I would still be making a payment for something. Bankruptcy is just hitting rock bottom faster. The way I see it, is why prolong the process of going downhill. The sooner you go down, the faster you can recover and come back up. That and I get to start off on a clean slate. Debt free. Chances of me filing for bankruptcy and trying to finance a car would probably be better than me trying to finance a car while going through the debt settlement process.

I'm actually quite relieved and excited for our new journey back to the top. It's nice to feel like you have hope again. To make things better and to make things right. Hopefully, I will continue to blog about our journey of financial recovery and in a couple years be able to say that we are doing okay!

Super MOM

I've been DYING to blog for the last couple days but it's been crazy busy at work and in my personal life that time just does not permit! It's funny because the other night I told Brandon I feel like a freaking super mom when I really look at all that I managed to do for my family with the little bit of time I had. I manage to make sure dinner is on the table every night (almost every night except maybe on the weekends.) So I thought to myself last night, what is my schedule like?

Here it is, the schedule of a SUPER MOM

6:15-7:00AM -Wake up, get Chase dressed, get myself ready, get dinner in the slow-cooker and run out the door.
7:00-8:20AM - Drive to work
8:20-4:30PM - Work without a lunch so I can leave 30 minutes early.
4:30-5:50PM - Drive to Chase's school to pick him up
6:05PM - Get home
6:05-6:30PM - Dinner is served, eat mine really quick so I can get Chase's bath started before he is done.
6:30-6:50PM - Give Chase a bath
6:50-7:30PM - Clean up the kitchen, sometimes the dishes if Brandon doesn't do them and hang out with Chase.
7:30PM - Put Chase down for bed.
7:30-8:00PM - Prepare dinner for tomorrow. Get stuff ready for the slowcooker.
8:00-9:00PM- Watch a recorded show with the fiance
9:00-9:30PM- Shower and bedtime ritual

So that is an estimate of my schedule because sometimes Brandon gives Chase a bath and I do the dishes or Brandon has to work late and I do everything on my own. Sometimes we feel a little crazy and watch two shows and stay up til 10pm. But I realized that throughout my whole day...I really don't sit down til about 7:15pm at night and even then it's not really sitting and relaxing because I have Chase running around and climbing over me. I have a VERY tight knit schedule. Everything pretty much is like back to back, move! move! move!

I think for someone who drives an average of 3 hours a day I still manage to make sure we always have dinner on the table and usually on time. I also do the dishes every night and our house is not the cleanest, but it is pretty darn tidy compared to some homes I've seen. One thing I'm really big on, is the kitchen being clean. It bugs the living daylight out of me when the kitchen is messy. I seldom allow that to happen. I always put Chase's toys away every night if I forget to ask him to help me. Folding laundry is my weakness. We let our clean laundry lay on our bedroom floor but we've been doing a pretty good job of putting it away recently.

16 Weeks Left!

Went to my monthly check-up yesterday and guess what. I gained 6 lbs in the last month! I was really surprised since I didn't remember having a growth spurt so early on in the pregnancy the last time. Then again, I don't really remember the timeline of my last pregnancy. I'm officially 117 lbs and I started at 107. For the last month we had to decide on a due date. Since I'm opting for c-section again I get to pick a date. In Chinese, the number 8 is a very lucky number. It's kind of a homonym of rich, wealth..something along that line. So I kind of was hoping that maybe the new baby's birth date would be 8-8-12. Then we started thinking about the convenience of what day to have the baby and we decided on the 9th. Just because the 9th is a Thursday, so we can still take Chase to school Thursday morning and have our friend Holly pick him up that day and keep him overnight and take him to school Friday. Have my parents pick him up and maybe stay at our house Friday til Saturday and we would be out of the hospital by then. When I told the doctor the 9th, he said oh I don't operate on a Thursday...so I guess it's fate that the 8th it is! (Unless I go into labor that is)

So it's been decided August 8, 2012 will be the day. It's very nerve wrecking I must admit to calmly check yourself into the hospital knowing you're going to have the baby. I did that with Chase as well. I went in on a Wednesday for my weekly check-up and my due date was Saturday, July 24th. My doctor casually said, I'm going to be in the hospital tomorrow did you want to come in and have the baby? That's how Chase was born on July 22nd. In a way I think I would've preferred to have my water break and rush into the hospital. I feel that in the frantic would make the situation less frightening because you have less time to think about the actual process and what's going on. You're just like go! go! go! When you know you're going to walk into the hospital the next day and have a baby or in this case get cut open, you feel like you are freaking out inside instead. 

Anyways, my belly has been itching more and more which worries me. Itching leads to stretch marks and I am trying my best to prevent that. It may be kind of shallow of me, but am terrified to not bounce back. I know most women thinks it's natural and beautiful to have the body of mother. Let's face it people, if you could, you would want to do without the flabby skin and stretch marks. I'm on a mission (mental for now) to get back into shape. Maybe even as good of shape as I was before baby #1. I know it's a little bit of a stretch but I'm gonna try. 

 Baby bump has now advanced from kicks to more smooth movements like waves. Sometimes, I feel like he sits real low and there's this hard lump right under my belly button and it's sooo uncomfortable. Or, is that a "braxton hick." I'm still not sure what a contraction really feels like. I mean I do since I was induced prior to epidural. But apparently I was 4 cm dilated last time and had no idea. I was so worried that I would go into labor and not even know!  

My April Glam Bag!!!

Okay, so I finally got my much anticipated April Glam Bag! It really wasn't as exciting as I thought it would be..but for $10 dollars its not that bad. Plus, just the Lip Quench alone is worth more than what I paid for and I got the full size product!

This is what's in my Glam Bag!

It came in a very sleek pink packaging. It's cute, except I'm not really a pink person..but I like that it didn't come in a boring packaging!

So, the bag that it came in is a reusable cosmetic bag. Personally, again, not a fan of the pink but I like that it came with something that could be used again. It also comes with a card that briefs you on the item that's in the bag so you can go on their website myglam.com and buy the full size product that you like.

DermStore Lip Quench ($12)
Available on dermstore.com

Here is the description from the site: 

"DermStore Lip Quench hydrates, softens and adds a hint of color to your lips. Soybean, olive and sweet almond oils provide antioxidant protection and nutrients. Vitamin E treats dry, chapped lips. Perfect for wearing alone or over a matte lipstick for high shine lips."

Overall, it is pretty moisturizing. It's a little bit sticky for me. Feels like a lip gloss and I'm not sure if I like that. It has a subtle hint of color and a light scent. I don't know if I would spend $12 on it though.

Quality:  Good, comes in a typical lip gloss type applicator. A little hard to squeeze out since its so thick.

True to Color: Not sure if this really applies, but it does have a little pink to it.

Pigmentation: N/A

Effectiveness: Effective. Hydrates your lips!

Rating: 5

Urban Decay 24/7 Glide-On Pencil ($19)

Available on urbandecay.com

 First off, I love this eyeliner. I think it's the only pencil liner that doesn't smudge and actually stays on ALL DAY. I have issues with pencil liners because my eye lids get greasy and I have Asian eyelids so everything creases or smudges after a while. I'm not thrilled about the fact that the one I got from the Glam Bag is pink. I just don't think it's very wearable but I'm sensing a pink trend going here. Nonetheless, it is still an awesome eyeliner and maybe one day I'll find the use for it when I'm feeling crazy. The bottom picture is to show you the size of the one I received. I have the full size one in "zero"  and mine is still longer and it's used. So for $19 dollars I definitely think it's worth it.

Quality: Great, glides on easy.
True to Color: Pretty accurate to the pencil!
Pigmentation: Very pigmented as you can see from the picture.
Effectiveness: Really does stay on "24/7."
Rating: 5




All-Belle False Lashes

I don't know much about this product. It's in Chinese so I don't understand it. According to MyGlam, they are handmade in Taiwan and can be worn up to 10x's. I don't really use false lashes that much but when I try them I'll let you know!

All Over Eye Shadow Brush & Liner Brush

I'm guessing this is their signature "Glammie" brush. Glammies are what they call subscribers of My Glam. They're made of pony hair and pretty small as you can see. Haven't gotten to try them yet but seems pretty soft!

So overall, the products were not as exciting as I had hoped. I still enjoyed having something to look forward to and can't wait for the next one. I was hoping for more products like eye shadow or blush. I guess more make-up than accessories. 

To change or not to change..

So this Saturday I am getting my once every 6 months cut. I notice that when I'm pregnant my hair becomes very frizzy and bushy. I straighten my hair almost everyday, but lately I don't even bother. I feel like it's so thick and coarse that it'll just take forever and even if I do, it feels like straw still! So I'm getting my hair cut from our neighbor who's a hairdresser. It's my first time getting my hair cut by her but I am very excited! She works at a higher end salon and I love her hair. That's kind of how I judge a hairdresser before deciding if she's "the one" for me. I wouldn't trust a hairdresser that doesn't even take care of her own hair or if the style of their hair is not really for me, I know she won't be able to accomplish the look I'm going for.

For a long time now, I've had the same hair. I just layer it, thin it out and cut it. That's about it. I don't do anything fancy because I never do my hair, hell I don't even brush it! I do straighten it everyday or straighten part of it. I need something that's low maintenance and it's hard because I have frizzy wavy hair. I've also thought about dying my hair now for over 2 years. But I can't seem to make the move to dye my born again virgin hair. I kind of like Jessica Biel's waves. Although, I don't know if she curls it to get it to look that way! I really like the color too. I think Jessica, my neighbor/hairdresser, says its called something but I can't seem to remember.

Or what about even shorter... I've contemplated shorter hair for a while now. Although, I have a fear of going too short. I hate regretting my haircut. That looks like something I can actually do if I straighten my hair everyday.

Or should I keep it long and look for hairstyles that I know will look good straight? All I know how to do is straighten hair. I don't usually brush my hair and if it's long it stays wavy instead of frizzy. Well a little of both.  I think the long straight look is cute. Has some layers and dimensions to it...

Dying to decorate!!

Okay, so I've been dying to decorate our place FOREVER. The problem is, we are so tight on money that we never get to and we are only renting so is it even worth it?

I moved into our small 2 bedroom 1 bath condo when my fiance still lived in it with his old roommate. His old roommate was in the process of moving out and that was his first home with his current wife. So instead of us getting to move into a clean place, it was more like we were swapping stuff out. What I would LOVE to do, is move out of the place and move back into it. I feel like the place never got cleaned. I try to keep it clean, but I was never able to clean every crown molding, every crack and corner. I feel like if we emptied it and had Molly Maid come and just clean the place and deep clean the carpet, we can move into it and maintain it a little better. My house is not messy, but there is just dust around the floor boards and our blinds are caked with dirt/dust that I can't even clean with a wet cloth!

Pretty much all of the furniture that is in our condo now came from when I shared an apartment with Jaccie. So things are very simple, we have a dining table, a sectional, coffee table, a bookcase, my old bed and well Chase's room has a crib and and old dresser that my fiance found at a job which was his old dresser before we moved in. (I just realized how drab my place sounds right now). I LOVE our friends house, who is also our neighbor, who is also my fiance's old roomate and his wife. She's from Sweden and you would think it was out of a creative IKEA catalog. I wish I had her creativity. Although, I feel like I do, I just don't have the money to decorate. I'm the type of person that has to just do everything at once. Not just a piece at a time. I've been really into the site. bhg.com. Although, the ideas they have in there are..well not as realistic. It's pretty to look at, but lets face it. The pictures of kitchens and living rooms are that of a wealthy home. I need ideas for a small condo. I feel like our walls are so bare, our patio is so blah, There's no creativity at all. Everything matches and that's about it. Another issue that I come across with having a nicely decorated home is that it usually is not child proof. Meaning there are way too many corners for kids to bump into, too many knick knacks they can just pick up and put in their mouth or throw. It's almost like you have to choose between having a nice home or having a child friendly home.

Well, I plan on maybe doing a little low budget home decorating or "revamping." Our patio for one is so bland. It's literally one color and it's like the Sahara desert. I swear the sun beats on our patio for 8 hours a day, then the other side of our wall for another 3. Our place gets SO HOT in the summer because the sun rises shining on one side of the wall only to drift to the other side. So the only time when it doesn't get sun is when it's dark out. I want to have some plants in our patio but we have two problems. One, I don't garden well. I've never been able to have a plant live pass a month. Two, what is possible going to grow on our patio besides freaking cactus.

Maybe next time Easter!

So this weekend would've been Chase's first Easter. I feel like a terrible mom, but we did not celebrate AT ALL. Let me start off by saying, I wanted to really bad but I just didn't know how!

I grew up in a family that didn't really celebrate anything. We weren't enthusiastic about anything, let's just put it that way. We didn't have a Christmas tree or decorated the house (unless if I did it), no big Thanksgiving dinner and even on Chinese New Years we just had dinner and the usual. Easter was definitely a forgotten holiday. I don't even know what celebrating Easter should be like. This year I thought I was going to have enough money to make Chase and the neighborhood kids Easter baskets. I don't even know what to put in them, but I was going to attempt to try. However, I'm really tight on money right now so I didn't get a chance to do that. When Friday came around, I told my fiance that I would really like to take Chase to do something Easter. Maybe at the city park where they would have Easter activities like egg hunts and such. We ended up going to the swap meet with some friends.

I know that Chase isn't going to remember and he had fun that day regardless, but I FEEL BAD! I told myself once I started my own family that I am going to celebrate every holiday. My fiance and I have gotten a Christmas tree every year since we've lived together and we've had Christmas dinner at our house since then as well. I mean a traditional Christmas dinner. We usually celebrate Thanksgiving with his grandma and I decorate for Halloween and took Chase trick-or-treating.

I think my fiance was really bummed that we didn't have anything planned for Easter and that it didn't feel Easter-y that there was no point in trying to celebrate anyways? I had to explain to him that I've never celebrated Easter before so he's got to help me out in this department because I don't even know what we're suppose to do! Maybe next year we'll go out and spend it with grandma..

On another note, I had a great 3 day weekend. My friend Jaccie came up to spend the day with me Friday. Me and her spent many inseparable years together. We lived together from 17-22 and most of those years we even shared a room together. When we hang out, it's effortless. We don't have to talk, we don't have to plan anything fun. We can just sit and watch TV and it feels so normal. When I left San Diego, I left my entire life behind. It was very sudden and even though it's not that far, it's also not that close. Out of everything and everybody, I must admit I miss her the most. I miss having a best friend. I moved around a lot when I was young so I never stayed anywhere long enough to have a best friend or a friend I've known for more than 3 years. For the first time in my life, I felt like I had a best friend..she was more like a sister to me. We have definitely grown a little bit apart because we don't see each other much anymore and both of our lives have changed drastically (mainly mine). But whenever we are together it feels the same. I know it sounds so cheesy. I really miss having my best friend around. I miss having my own friends around. I've grown to love the people I've made friends with since I've been with Brandon, but it's still not the same as your own friends that you meet and bond on your own terms.

We had a bbq Friday night, which turned into a neighborhood thing. I think half the neighborhood was in our tiny 2 bedroom condo. It was fun though, it's nice to do things on a Friday night, it makes your weekend seem longer. We went to the swap meet and I got a cute dress for $18. It was so freaking hot that I am not looking forward to summer.

Chase has been in a reaally good mood lately. I don't want to jinx it but a month ago he was just in this terrible crabby mood. He was like this angry teenager that just didn't want anything but wanted everything at the same time. It was a really rough patch I must admit because that's the last thing you want to deal with after a long day of work. Lately, he's been really goofy, extremely hyper and just lots of fun! He still has his moments but it's definitely not as bad as it was before. He has even picked up a few new words and tries to copy more words. We still haven't gotten him to pedal on his bike yet but at least he gets the idea of trying to keep his foot on the pedal. Maybe it's still too soon, but I feel like the earlier we introduce it to him the earlier he might just get it. I love that little booger more and more everyday. He's so much more cuddlier and I love it. When Chase was a baby, we made sure that he wasn't going to be one of those babies that needs to be held all the time. It was hard to do because at one point, he just didn't like to be held period! I see other people's son who would fall asleep in their arms and I'm like aw, isn't that sweet. Well, Chase is definitely a cuddler now and I love it!

Chicken Stroganoff Slow-Cooker Recipe

Okay so I haven't used my slow-cooker in a while and I finally did yesterday morning. It was a last minute thing since I remembered the fiance is going to the gym after work which means no time to cook dinner. So I remembered a VERY SIMPLE slow-cooker recipe which pretty much consisted of stuff I had in the fridge and pantry. Chicken Stroganoff! I prepped it all in the morning which took about...5 minutes? Awesome right. Btw, most stroganoffs contains mushroom. My fiance is not a fan so all of my recipes are mushroom free (bummer I know). Feel free to try this with Campbells Cream of Mushroom Soup instead!

Chicken Stroganoff

1 lb chicken breast, cubed

1 0.7oz dry italian dressing

1/8 cup margarine

1 8 oz cream cheese

1 10.75 oz Campbells Cream of Chicken 

Cook Time: 6 hrs 45 minutes

Prep Time: 5 minutes

Serve this with any type of pasta you might like. I like using shells for this one. 

Take your cubed chicken breast and place it in the slow-cooker. Add your dry italian dressing and margarine and mix well. Make sure all of your chicken is coated. Turn your slow-cooker on low for 6 hours.

When your 6 hours is up, add the cream cheese and cream of chicken to the chicken and stir. It will be kind of hard to mix at first but do your best. Put it on high for 45 minutes. Mix and stir again, should be easier now that the cream cheese has melted. 

Add your cooked and drained pasta to the slow-cooker, mix and enjoy!

Distance makes the heart grow fonder..

So this weekend for the first time in a while, we had Chase stay with his grandparents. I'm battling this never ending cold and I could use some rest and my parents could use a little bonding time with Chase. I missed him two hours after he was gone. It was so sad, I carried him downstairs to my parent's car and he did not want to go. He just gets his blankie and he hugged me with his head on my shoulder. That made me so sad. Every time he doesn't want me to go, he wants his blanket and just holds me. I know right. I definitely could have used the break from Chase for just a little quiet time around the house so I can relax a bit, but man I missed the little booger. My fiance and I missed him by the time it was Sunday and we were ready for him to come home. It was definitely nice to have such a quiet house and to be able to do things without having to worry about Chase or scold him. We even said to ourselves, "Is this what it was like before we had a kid?" When Chase finally came home, he was so hyper and in this jolly mood. The silence has been broken and the house was back to normal. It also made us feel like he had mature and grown so much in just a day! Maybe we just noticed it more because we got a little break from him. I think it's definitely healthier to have a break from your kid for a day or two. It makes you appreciate them more and you get the mental break you need to regain your sanity!

Anyways, I am so freaking congested. It's been a week now and I still can't breathe through my nose and my ears are extremely clogged. I pretty much feel as crappy as I did the first day. I took Benadryl at night to help with my sleep and clear my nose but I'm just not so sure how I feel about Sudafed. They don't even sell Sudafed without checking ID anymore because that's one of the drugs they use for making meth!