5 Year Anniversary!

Brandon and I celebrated our 5 year anniversary this past Friday the 13th.  You know, we don't really know what anniversary it is for and it's because we never really had an official date.  So when people started asking us how long we've been together for, we really didn't know how to answer.  Me being the girl, I guess I'm suppose to remember this kind of stuff but I don't.  I came up with this great idea, let's pick the one night that we looked forward to the most and let that be the anniversary date.  The night that meant the most to us was the night before Spocom.

I have a good feeling about the next 5 years to come.  Maybe the fact that I'm looking at it in a positive light will help steer it in the right direction.  I've expressed the issues Brandon and I have.  We don't have a fairy tale relationship where everything is rainbow and lollipops.  In fact, it is very real and relate-able the issues that we deal with.  One thing that Brandon has never done was give up on us, even though I have wanted to.  When I think about all that we have endured, our path was not easy at all.  It was probably all of the hardest things that most relationships and couples endure in over a 10 year span.  We met each other for not even 6 months and I got pregnant.  We were both young and poor.  Without building a stable foundation for our relationship, we had to become parents at a very young age without really knowing each other.  Not only has this been a journal in discovering on how to be parents we were also discovering each other; to co-exist.

It helped me understand why the steps of a relationship is; date, marry, live together, then start a family.  You really need to have a strong foundation for your relationship because let me tell you, being parents will be the HARDEST thing you'll ever have to endure.  It pushes a person's limits on patience and frustrations.  Without a strong foundation, you just lash out at each other and that's exactly what we were doing.  To top that off, we struggled financially.

I never gave us much credit because at the time I didn't understand.  I was so blinded by how difficult everything was and yet I handled it with ease.  I didn't realize that it didn't matter how I handled it by myself, it's how we handle it together.  Parenting is a team sport if both of you are involved.  It's not a one person game.  We were so busy focusing on being great parents that we used up all of our patience and love with our kids and left none for each other.  I take part of the blame for us having such a hard time.  I had issues I needed to deal with and was not able to see past his mistakes.  I didn't take into consideration that not everyone is like me.  Sometimes, people can only focus on one thing at a time.

I really hope that the worse is behind us and it can only get better from here.  We are growing up, our kids are growing up and we will be in a better place.  I really hope that this is something good for us.  We have managed to make it this far, and I must say most of it is praise to Brandon for not giving up because I probably would've.  Let's hope for another 5 years!